From the Darkness to the Light

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Taarira battled with a drug addiction for 10 years before she decided she wanted to change the direction of her life.   

“After 10 years, I hit rock bottom,” she says. “Those were the dark days.” 

“My parents...were drug and alcohol addicts as well. There were custody issues. My mum passed away when I was four.” 

Taarira, who is a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, continued: “My grandmother wasn’t a member, but she took us to church and helped my brother to get baptized.”  

She believes she hit rock bottom before recognizing she needed to go back to church.  Taarira wanted to return to worship and fellowship because she wanted to have “the glow” she could see in the faces of those who live the gospel of Jesus Christ.  

“I wanted to put my whole heart into the gospel of Jesus Christ,” she said. 

When she decided to come back, Taarira put up a Facebook post asking if there was a Latter-day Saint meetinghouse in Wellsford, New Zealand, where she lived. A member of the congregation responded and said that there was a service each Sunday at 10 a.m. The next Sunday, Taarira showed up with her three-month-old baby, Kayson.  

She recalls that there was a warm feeling in the church building, and people were welcoming. 

“As I walked into the building, I felt like I was home with my brothers and sisters. I felt the love of God, I felt the Spirit, and I knew this is where the Lord wanted me to be.”  

Taarira said partaking of the sacrament became a different experience for her than previously. “When I first received the sacrament, I thought it was just bread and water, but now it’s like I feel His (Jesus Christ’s) pain,” she said.  “When I partake of the sacrament I remember Jesus, His crucifixion and what it must have felt like for Him.  

“I feel Him even when singing sacrament hymns. It’s a special time. When Monday comes, I can’t wait for Sunday to be here again.”  

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She reflects on a tender moment when receiving her patriarchal blessing (a blessing given to members of the Church who desire to receive guidance in their lives).  

On the way to receive the blessing, Taarira said the weather was “shocking” and she worried that the roads could close at any time. “But I prayed and got through. The roads closed ten minutes later.” 

Once she arrived, she received a witness of Heavenly Father’s love for her. “The Patriarch (a priesthood holder who has a special calling to give these blessings to others) really felt the Spirit. We were both crying.” 

“Reading scriptures helps me during the week,” says Taarira. “Reading before bed reminds me that I put the Saviour first in my life. If I don’t read each day, I don’t feel Him as well.” 

“The scriptures teach us a lot,” she continued. “They’re a guide to us in our life. I read scriptures to my baby. I want a good life for him. I love how the gospel of Jesus Christ teaches us to love everyone.” 

Taarira also likes spending time with the missionaries. Feeling excited about the gospel of Jesus Christ, she began sharing scriptures with people, and inviting them to attend church with her.  

Taarira recently moved to Perth, Australia, where she attends worship services every Sunday in the Rockingham area. Now holding a temple recommend (a document from her local leader that certifies her worthiness), she has felt joy in attending the Perth Temple. With the dark days behind her, “now there are great days,” she said. “We have been blessed.” 

“Today, I just want to give thanks to all the beautiful people who have been a big part of my journey in helping me get through my hard emotional times,” Taarira said. “Always pressing forward, I appreciate you all and love you unconditionally.  

“From me and Kayson, we give thanks.”