"Faith at Work" is a new feature from Pacific Mormon Newsroom focusing on members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints who are applying the teachings of Jesus Christ in their daily lives. The first “Faith at Work” article is by guest contributor, Grace Patterson. Grace is a 20-year-old Latter-day Saint woman from New Zealand. In her article she shares how a family might hold a weekly “family night” — or as Mormons often say, a “family home evening.” Grace is about to embark on 18 months volunteer service as a missionary for the Church in the United Kingdom.
How to Hold a Weekly Family Night
Many parent-child relationships are suffering today due to poor communication or, in some cases, an absence of communication altogether. Due to our increasingly busy lifestyles, it is easy to relate to each other via breakfast-bench-banter and corridor-chats-in-passing — at the expense of much needed meaningful conversations and time together. It is also easy to fall into a habit of using the home as only a place to eat, wash, and rest.
The home should be much more than that. The home should be a place wherein family bonds are made, relationships are strengthened, and quality time is spent. Friends may come and go, but family is forever. With these challenges in mind, here are five ideas to help any family to hold a weekly “family night” at home. This simple practice, many Latter-day Saints will attest, will lead to better communication and deeper relationships with those who matter most, our families.
1. Set aside a day of the week that works for every family member. Organise to not make any plans for that evening, and to be home by a pre-decided time. For example, select as a family that on Monday nights at 6pm each of you will be home and ready to enjoy a meal together, followed by an evening of activities.
2. Create a roster that includes each member of the family, and assign each person an aspect of the family night to plan. Perhaps one will prepare a treat of some kind for the family to enjoy; one will organise a game or an activity to participate in; one will plan a simple lesson where principles such as honesty, service, being a good neighbour or prayer can be discussed. Activities need not be expensive, nor do they need to require even leaving the house at all. Watching a film together in pyjamas with popcorn, or playing team sports in the back garden are free activities that bring joy, and draw the family closer together.
3. Once family night has officially started, make it a rule that all technological devices (e.g. cell phones, iPods, iPads, laptops etc.) are turned off or left in a certain room of the house. While this rule may not prove popular with teenagers, constant communication with people outside of the family is not conducive to a successful family night. This will also remove any temptation for them to not fully participate.
4. Choose activities and conversations that include every member of the family. Family night is not an excuse to hone in on one child’s recent mistakes — it is an opportunity to spend time together in an uplifting environment, to get to know one another better, and to stay in close touch with each other’s achievements, challenges and feelings.
5. Have a family council. This may well be the most important segment of family night. With the whole family together, family night is the perfect time to run through everybody’s plans for the week. Discussing this will pave the way for honesty in the home and openness between parents and children, whilst also giving you a fair idea of where your children will be, what activities they will be participating in, and the kind of company they are keeping. Also use this time to discuss any issues that individuals may have with other members of the family. Beware of allowing this portion of the evening to become a family-wide debate, but rather, use it as a time to make peace and encourage unity.
Having a weekly family night has countless benefits. Family life will be made richer and members will become more close-knit. Having just one night a week set aside for quality family time will allow for significant changes to occur in the way that family members treat and talk to one another. It also opens lines of communication so that family members are aware of what is happening in the lives of their loved ones. It also creates an environment where open, honest and positive communication and experiences take place more often throughout the rest of the week.
Mormon Newsroom states: “Since 1915, the family home evening program, established by Church leadership, has encouraged Latter-day Saint parents to build and strengthen family relationships. Today, “family home evenings” are generally held weekly on Monday nights.”
Read more at Pacific Mormon Newsroom.
LDS.org has a page titled, "Family Home Evening," which includes ideas and resources for families planning a family night.
"The concept of a united family that lives and progresses forever is at the core of Latter-day Saint doctrine," according to Mormon Newsroom. "Within families led by a father and a mother, children develop virtues such as love, trust, loyalty, cooperation and service."
This theological foundation inspires millions of Latter-day Saints around the world to work hard to strengthen marriages and families by learning, teaching and living the gospel of Jesus Christ. Holding weekly family night is one way that Latter-day Saints seek to achieve those aims.
Guest contributor: Grace Patterson.
Journalists wishing to participate in a family night with a Latter-day Saint family can call the Pacific Area Public Affairs Office in Auckland, New Zealand on +64 (0)9-488-5572 to make arrangements.